Jenna Bush's Wedding Day

Copyright © 2008 Timothy Horrigan



Jenna Bush's wedding invite

Extra! [May 28, 2008] I promised back on May 11 that I would be revising this page "in the next few days" to reflect the fact that Jenna Bush's upcoming wedding is now no longer upcoming. And I haven't gotten around to it yet. Sorry.

I do feel the need to pass this little item on, in the meantime. It sounds like a joke but it was true. Jenna Bush (now known as "Jenna Hager") did indeed offer Ellen Degenres the use of her parent's ranch for her upcoming nuptials. This happened on May 22, 2008 during the taping for the May 28 edition of the "Ellen Show" The media (and myself) have been jumping all over the marriage angle of this appearance, even though the main reason Jenna and her mom were on the show was to promote their new blockbuster children's book, the instant classic Read All About It!

Ellen has announced that she will be marrying her girlfriend Porta DeRossi, now that gay marriage is legal in California (though not Texas.).

Ellen DeGeneres with Porta DeRossi

Jenna Bush's wedding invite

Extra!  [May 11, 2008; 6:00 p.m. EDT] They did it: Jenna Bush & Henry Hager got married! Several pictures were released the afternoon after their wedding. Here are my favorites from the released pictures. I was slow putting them up, but I have a good excuse, it was Mother's Day and I visited my mother after going to a Mother's Day peace vigil.

These are all official White House photos (although I tweaked the color settings, etc.) There are unlikely to be any unofficial photos because all cellphones and cameras were confiscated before the guests were allowed to go to the events. The guests were family and friends: the highest ranking politicians (aside from the two President George Bushes) were Jenna's Uncle Jeb and Henry's mentor Lord Karl Rove. The officiant at the lakeside ceremony (held in fromt of a spooky limestone cross) was a Black minister from Houston named Pastor Kirbyjon Caldwell, who is an old family friend.

I will be gradually editing the page over the next few days to reflect the fact that the wedding did in fact happen as planned. There were nasty thunderstorms and tornadoes all over the south central U.S. on May 10, 2008, but they missed Crawford, Texas.

Jenna Bush in her wedding gown

The bride in her Oscar de la Renta wedding gown. The pre-wedding news reports invariably described the gown as "highly structured." It doesn't seem all that structured to me, although I am sure the undergarments were elaborate. A lovely gown for a lovely bride. (Hey! It's not her fault her father is the worst President in American history.)


George W. Bush with his daughter on her wedding day

No caption needed. You know who these people are.



The point of no return.

Jenna Bush & Henry Hager with her family

The Bush Family

Jenna Bush & Henry Hager with their parents

The newlyweds and their parents.

Jenna Bush & Henry Hager on their wedding day, as the sun sets

The sun sets on the Bush Regime, but it rises for the couple's life together.

Jenna Bush's wedding cake

Cutting the cake which is leaning slightly to the right (or is it to the left? It is leaning to the bride and groom's left.)

George & Laura Bush at the airport, May 11, 2008

Sunday morning at the airport: Laura actually spends most of her time in Texas, but she did fly back to DC this time. She even gave a speech the next day.

See also:






Extra! [May 11, 2008; 10:30pm EDT] Still no sign of the official pix. And no new news. (My web site got at least 600 extra hits yesterday, probably about 1000, by the way. It's surprisingly hard to count web hits exactly.) I did manage to scrounge up some pictures of the busses which took the guests to the ceremony...

Busses taking FLDS polygamist wives and children to detention camp

oops, my bad, wrong busses...

these are the right busses!




At least two blogs have used wedding-related material they scrounged up rom my site, which is cool.




Extra! [May 10, 2008; 10:30pm EDT] So far the official picture has apparently not been released. We do know a few details, however. The ceremony was performed by a longtime Bush family friend, Rev. Kirbyjon H. Caldwell of the Windsor Village United Methodist Church in Houston— who ironically is a Barack Obama supporter. The father-daughter dance at the reception was the old Joe Cocker song "You Are So Beautiful" performed by the Tyrone Smith Revue. The couples first dance was Taj Mahal's "Lovin' in My Baby's Eyes. " ("Super T" heads a wedding band with a 70s funk and blues flavor to it.) And we know the weather was fine in Crawford, even though there were severe thunderstorms not far away in the Temple area (which is where most of the guests are staying.) The ceremony was performed in front of a limestone altar with a attached three-ton cross which Bush II designed himself. No word on whether he and Lord Chamberlain Cheney will be using it for any ceremonials of a somewhat more esoteric nature at some point in the future. The reception was held under tents set up for the occasion.


 Princess Jenna Bush, the daughter of Emperor Bush II and Empress Laura, announced her betrothal on Wednesday August 16, 2007 to her longtime boyfriend Henry Hager. For the past few years, Hager has been fighting on the front lines of the War Against Evil as an aide to Karl Rove.

Sir Henry (as he now known) was, most noteably, one of the courageous young men and women who toiled beside Lord Rove in the Situation Room of the basement of the White House during the Hurricane Katrina crisis, documenting the errors made by the liberal Democrats in Louisiana. He also served with distinction during the Election of 2004, when the usurper John Kerry and the American people tried and failed to overthrow the Emperor. Hager is currently fighting Marxism by finishing his MBA studies at the University of Virginia's Darden School of Business.  He will take the title of Duke of Baltimore on his wedding day, and his father John Henry Hager will become the Duke of Richmond.  The elder Henry Hager is a former tobacco executive who until recently served as the Assistant Secretary of Education for Special Education & Rehab Services. He was in charge of (amongst other things) Special Ed testing programs.

Not long after the engagement was announced, Jenna told the story of how Hager popped the question. She told ABC's Diane Sawyer and People Magazine that he woke her up at 4:00am August 15th while they were camping in Acadia National Park in Maine, made her hike up Mount Cadillac against her will and popped the question when they reached the summit at sunrise. It is not coincidental that this is the first place the sun rises each day in the United States.

The wedding date was finally announced in January: Princess Jenna and Sir Henry will be married on Saturday, May 10, 2008 at her parents' ranch in Crawford, Texas. 


Extra! In December 2007, bizarre rumors circulated that Barbara would be marrying Mitt Romney. These stories turned out to be totally misleading. For one thing, the rumor-mongers mixed Barbara up with her cousin Noelle Bush.


Yahoo! Personals


Jenna's wedding date came at a time when Emperor Bush's subjects are short of bread (in every sense of the word "bread") and she has refused to put on a circus (although the security precautions— and the wedding itself— will be highly expensive.) It will in fact be a wedding of the sort which Liberal Democrats tend to favor: strenuously casual, held at an gratuitously inconvenient venue (the President's ranch is in a remote area of South Central Texas and the Princess in fact actually grew up in Austin), and it will be linked to irrelevant causes (in this case, wildflowers and literacy) which are supposed to be of special significance to the couple.

The literacy may seem ironic because the Emperor is a man of limited book learnin'— but the Princess and the Empress are both elementary reading teachers.

The wildflowers are the theme of the wedding. Apparently, Empress Laura has been keeping herself busy all these years by planting wildflowers on the ranch in Crawford. The dresses for the "house party" (i..e., what folks in the other 49 states would refer to as the "bridesmaids") are also wildflower-colored. (In Texas, the "bridesmaid" is what non-Texans would refer to by the term "maid of honor." Jenna's bridesmaid will be the other twin, Barbara.) The designer Lela Rose released the following sketch of some of the house party dresses:

Jenna's wedding gown is known to be by Oscar de la Renta, but it is being safeguarded by Lord Chamberlain Cheney in an undisclosed location.

The wedding will supposedly take place off camera, and will be a relatively casual outdoor affair, held in the early evening to protect the 200 or so guests from the Texas sun (which gets hot even though the Emperor does not believe in Global Warming.) At least one photo will be officially released, and I will doubtless post it (or them) here somewhere. The ranch is seven miles from the tiny town of Crawford, and few if any guests will in fact see the town itself.

The rehearsal dinner actually and other pre-wedding day celebrations actually took place over 50 miles away in the pre-Civil War town of Salado,Texas at the Stagecoach Inn:

The Princess is ostensibly a deeply private person: however, she has been crisscrossing the country for the past year promoting her own book Ana's Story: A Journey of Hope and a picture book she did with Empress Laura, Read All About It!

       

After the wedding Jenna & Henry will be moving to a row house which Henry bought for $440,000 on the south side of Baltimore, not far from the Baltimore Ravens' stadium which is currently known as " M&T Bank Stadium ". The house's assessed value is $296,780. The exact address is 1345 South Charles Street; Baltimore MD 21230.


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Here are a few pictures which have surfaced from the preparations for the wedding:



Barbara, Jenna and Henry hurrying to a party; Austin, April 26, 2008. Barbara and her pal Katherine Harris had just been involved in an incident which seemed embarrassing at the time but has now been laughed off.

The Bush Twins at Jenna's bachelorette party

Barbara and Jenna at Jenna's bachelorette party; Austin, May 7, 2008

Jenna Bush & Henry Hager at a baseball game, shortly before their marriage

Jenna sharing a quiet moment with Henry at a Round Rock Express baseball game (just outside Austin); May 6, 2008



Barbara sharing a quiet moment with Katherine Harris at Mount Carmel, near Waco, May 8, 2008


Emperor Bush II practices on the South Lawn of the White House for his Walk Down the Aisle; May 9, 2008






Jenna and Barbara and Jenna's hen party

You might also want to check out my main Bush Twins page:



Although the liberal media like to paint young Republicans as stodgy and unfashionable. Henry and Jenna are way more hip than that boring old Chelsea Clinton— as proven by these next two pictures.

Here is Sir Henry in Boston with his ex-boss Lord Rove and other friends. The red Speedos represent the fact that the Republicans aren't counting any state as being "Blue"— not even the Bluest of all states, Massachusetts.

Henry Hager, Karl Rove and friends in red speedos; Boston; December 2007
Henry Hager, Karl Rove & friends in Boston; December 2007. Even though they are wearing Speedos outdoors in the winter, that does not mean they believe in Global Warming!



And here is Jenna with her close friend John Waters, the film-maker and author who is now her neighbor in Baltimore:

Jenna Bush posing with John Waters
Jenna with John Waters;April 1, 2008





Jenna Hager dancing with Henry Hager


More to come later...

See also:





Jenna and Barbara and Jenna's hen party

You might also want to check out my main Bush Twins page:


Extra!  [May 8, 2008] I have created a separate page (this page, duh!) about Jenna Bush's wedding to Henry Chase Hager, on May 10, 2008, even though I am not entirely why I should bother.  I am hoping for a lot of traffic, even though the spike I got on the day they (somewhat unexpectedly) announced their engagement was not too profitable,  I got thousands of hits (the various mechanisms I have for tracking the number of hits gave me various numbers ranging from about 5,000 to over 30,000 and the logfile was over 57 Megabytes long) but very few paying clicks.  I only made $2.58 from my various pay-per-click and affilate ads, I made no Amazon.com affiliate sales whatsoever, and only about 1% of the visitors clicked through to any of the other pages on my site.  And I had to shell out an extra $15.00 to my internet host provider to pay for the excess bandwidth I used (which I was glad to do.) The folks who respond to the search engine listings for my Bush Twins page tend to be very focussed: when they click on a search hit, they only want to see that one page and they don't want to bother with any other damn pages, thank you very much! (The first week of May I got a lot of hits, thanks to the wedding and to the hype for the book Read All About It! I got over 2,500 hits that week with no— "no" as in zero, nada, bupkus, rien, not even one, not any, ningún, zero— Adsense clickthroughs, and only a handful of clickthroughs to the various other pages on my web site, although a few folks did click on links to news stories, etc.)

Initially, the subject matter was much the same on this page as on my main page, but that should change over time. I couldn't just move it all from the main page, because then hardly anyone would see it.





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